"My dad had the right idea. And it all worked out. He used to say to me: 'Son, don't miss the wonders that surround you because every tree, every rock, every anthill, every star is filled with the wonders of nature.' And he used to say to me: 'Have you ever noticed how grateful you are to see daylight again after coming through a long dark tunnel?' 'Well,' he'd say, 'Always try to see life around ya as if you'd just come out of a tunnel.'"
-Jefferson Smith as played by the wonderful James Stewart in Mr. Smith Goes to Washington
Guys, I'm tired. Tired of living in the tunnel. Tired of sitting around and twiddling my thumbs when there are things to be done and mountains to climb. Tired of forgetting the wonders that surround me. And mostly I'm tired of being tired. And I'm going to do something about that.
I'm not entirely sure what that something is, but I'm guessing it's going to involve quite a bit of hand-shaking, lip-biting determination. But I think I've got the guts in my blood for it. For starters, I've decided that my life is, in fact, already exciting and I don't have to sit around waiting for adventures to find me.
That being said, I'm coming out of the tunnel today and I wanted this post to be all about the exciting things that are surrounding me. (Be warned, I'm about to start talking about myself even more than usual, today. Oh, and there are also going to be pictures of me . . . you have been warned.)
As most people already know, I'm going on a Study Abroad this summer. It was somewhat of a crazy, impulsive thing I decided to do Fall semester. I heard about it from one of the professors in charge of it, saw the posters in the art building on campus and said "what the heck, why not?" Suddenly, a semester later, I find myself buying plane tickets and trying to learn German. How much more of an adventure could I have asked for? Sorry, I'm getting ahead of myself. Some of you are probably interested to know the details of my impending excursion. So, I'll be in Europe for the entirety of summer term, mainly in Berlin, but we're also spending time in Paris, Copenhagen, Amsterdam, Brussels (among others). It's going to be insane. Especially when you consider I'm also having to focus on classes in the midst of all these really great experiences. But I think it will be good. Between devouring delicious European street foods and creating my own art I won't have any time for second-guessing or home-sicking. In addition to the program, I'll also be visiting Iceland (I've got some pretty lengthy layovers there on my flight there and back) and spending extra time in Brussels with my brother. So, yeah. What's not to be excited about?
Oh, and here's this "selfie" I took on Instagram. It's one of those rare occurrences where I actually like a picture that I took of myself on purpose. Oh, and that's my passport. (We won't look at my actual passport picture, because I look like a total convict).
Okay, moving right along. I'm not sure if I mentioned this here on my blog, but at the beginning of Winter semester I applied to some scholarships. One was a standard academic scholarship (based on your GPA and all that jazz) and the other was something called a Talent Award. Well, good news. I got the academic scholarship . . . and a Talent Award . . . and a very unexpected scholarship . . . ta-dah! There's not much to say about the academic scholarship, other than it was an incredible relief to have received it. I think somewhat more of an explanation is in order for these other scholarships, though. So, for the Talent Award I had to submit a portfolio of my art back in February and then do a good deal of waiting while professors and department heads reviewed and scrutinized it. I struggle with waiting, but I endured and it turned out to be well worth the wait. I got an email a week or so before the application for my major (Studio Art) was due, informing me that I had received a scholarship. I was ecstatic and might have done a silent little happy dance in my bedroom. Of course, having some of my tuition paid for was going to be fantastic (especially with all the Study Abroad expenses I was incurring), but I think I was even more relieved when I realized that I no longer had to apply for my major. You see, the scholarship is an automatic in. If you get the scholarship, you're in the major. It was one of those crazy moments when I realized that my life is actually going somewhere. I don't really know where exactly that is, but it's going. And faster than I expected, which is completely terrifying, but also exhilarating and incredibly exciting. So, anyways, there was this fancy award night for the scholarship winners and families. It was here that I found out I also received a "named" scholarship. It's one of those scholarships where someone sets up a scholarship fund in memoriam of a relative or someone like that who was very influential or did a lot of really great and amazing things. The scholarship I got was the Anna F. Sommers scholarship. It took me by complete surprise and it was very humbling. Here I was, worrying and agonizing over whether I'm any good at art and second-guessing my future plans, when out of the blue I get this incredible award. Obviously someone believes in me, so maybe I should too. It's time for me to stop complaining and get to work.
These are pictures from the awards night. Mostly it's just me eating brownies. Yum!
And now we come to the last, most recent exciting thing from that life that is mine. So, winter semester just ended for me last week and it was a little bittersweet. I'm one of those crazy people who really loves school. I know it doesn't always seem like that, but it's true. I love teachers and classes and having something to do (even when I absolutely do not want to do it). I'm always a little sad when classes end. What if I didn't do my best? What if I don't remember anything? What if the teacher thinks I'm stupid and I've run out of opportunities to prove them wrong? What if I never see any of these people that I've shared all these experiences with ever again? I think it's probably thoughts like these that make me do crazy things near the end of the semester. For instance, on the last day of Archaeology I went to thank my professor after class for the great semester. I told him I was still in love with Archaeology and we started talking about other classes I could take. Well, a day or so later I found myself in the social sciences advisement center filling out an anthropology minor request form and then taking that form to the visual arts advisement center. It wasn't until I got back to my apartment that I actually stopped to think. I just added an anthropology minor to my college education for no other reason except that I love Archaeology and want to take more classes. Granted, I still think that's a good enough reason, but it was incredibly impulsive and a potentially life-changing decision. But, I think being impulsive is good for me. When I stop to think for too long about things, doubts and confusion fight their way in and I get paralyzed by the thought of going on, no matter what choice I make. I need to start doing. It's time I stopped thinking and wasting the day!